Fiona's Birth Story

Better late than never!

Fiona Maeve was born on May 27th via a planned c-section -- pretty much the exact opposite of her brother's birth. After my first traumatic labor and emergency c-section I considered a VBAC but in the end decided that since I'm really not a good candidate (small pelvis) and I didn't want to end up with another emergency situation I would go for the planned c-section. It was a hard decision for me but one that made the most sense for all of us.

Ready to go for surgery and meet our little girl!

On the morning of her birth we arrived at the hospital with all of our stuff after a good night's sleep (so different). The nurses took great care of us and my anesthesiologist was absolutely amazing. After about 90 minutes of taking vitals and getting prepped we were wheeled down to the operating room. I was feeling very nervous and excited at this point, everything seemed like it was going SO quickly. I was administered the spinal which would numb me from the waist down, which stung but not as bad as I was anticipating. The worst part of the day was right after I got the spinal, I started to feel very nauseous and tingly throughout my whole body. I thought maybe I was going to feel like this for the whole surgery but within 5-10 minutes my body felt numb and a complete calm washed over me.

I had a moment to look around and made a comment about how exciting it was that there were about 10 people in the room and only one (besides Patrick) was a man (a scrub tech in the corner). I had two female OB's performing the surgery, a female anesthesiologist, and a whole bunch of amazing female nurses. It will be so fun to tell my daughter that she came into the world surrounded by a group of talented female clinicians!

After about 20 minutes we heard that she was about to come into the world! There was a little clear section of plastic in the drape that was shielding the surgery which was opened and after a little pressure on my abdomen she was right there in front of us! The first thing I said was "she looks exactly like her brother!!" Then I asked if she was really small because she seemed so tiny to me. I think it was just in comparison to her huge older brother. They told me she was normal size. :)

After a couple of minutes clearing her lungs they set her on my chest and she immediately relaxed, was quiet and snuggled in to me -- which is soooo her personality still. The doctors and nurses remarked that she was a very relaxed baby and it was unusual that she was so calm. She laid on my chest for another 40 minutes while they stitched me up and I think Patrick and I were on cloud nine just smiling and taking photos. After that we got wheeled upstairs to our room and spent the rest of the day feeding her and meeting family.

Fiona's birth-day was really sweet and heavenly, I couldn't have hoped for more from my planned c-section. I will say that the next day reality began to settle in that I was going to have a long recovery from major surgery. I unfortunately had a tear in my bladder during the procedure (caused by previous scar tissue) that caused me to have to wear a catheter home for a week. I would never recommend a c-section to someone who can give birth vaginally but it was definitely the right choice for us. And two months later I am feeling great!

Did you have a birth plan?

With one week to go until baby girl arrives I've been reflecting on labor and delivery quite a lot.

Going into the Mylo's birth, I had a clear plan of action. I wanted to have a natural, drug-free labor and deliver my baby vaginally. That did not happen! I ended up with a long list of interventions and an emergency c-section under general anesthesia. I was thrilled to have a healthy baby but also deeply disappointed and a little traumatized by my labor experience after he was born.

One very unhelpful thing that people still say to me is that "people shouldn't plan out their births at all, it's the one's with long and specific birth plans who end up with disappointing experiences." Sorry, but that's just BS. I am a planner and researcher by nature. I hired a doula for my labor (HIGHLY recommend!) and read several books about labor and delivery. Although things didn't turn out as I'd hoped, I had a lot of knowledge in my head that helped inform the long labor process as I was going through it. I never felt like the situation was out of my control or I didn't have enough information to make the next decision that was presented to me.

Each person has a different mentality going into birth. For me, planning and researching is calming and makes me feel more confident. For others it makes them anxious to know about all of the options and they would rather just trust the professionals.

This time, under the advisement of my OBGYN, we are doing a planned C-section. Although I would have liked to avoid major surgery, I feel confident this is the right choice for my body, our family, and my baby. It should be a totally different experience than the first time. I'll let you know how it goes!

Did you have a birth plan? Do you prefer to plan and prepare or let things just take their course? Would love to hear your thoughts in the comments.

Would You Hire a Birth Photographer?

The idea of someone photographing the birth of my baby always seemed a bit odd to me before Mylo was born. I wanted the experience of giving birth to be intimate and really only include Patrick, myself, our doula, and minimal assistance from medical professionals along the way. If you've read his birth story you know I didn't really get my wish. Now that I can reflect on the experience it might be nice to have some classy, professional, birth photos to look back on now. Especially because the natural part of my labor was so overshadowed by the needed interventions that took place in the end. I'm so grateful for the photos that Jason was able to snap just after I met Myles for the first time. I was so drugged I barely even remember him taking them but they are very special to us now. I recently read an article on Babble about how in a C-section delivery, birth photography can be even more important since the photos will serve as the eyes of the mother since she can't see what is happening.

I tried to take photos when my sister gave birth to Rory but I did NOT do the moment justice. It was one of the most beautiful and magical moments I have ever experienced and I just wasn't able to capture that with my camera. Although it may be weird to have a stranger or acquaintance in the room during this intimate moment it would also be nice to have those private photos for years to come.

These are lovely photos of a birth and here is an interesting interview with a birth photographer. Did you hire a birth photographer? Would you?

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Myles' Birth Story

We welcomed Myles Patrick Hillis to the world on Saturday, July 20th at 6:19pm! He weighed 7lbs 6oz and was 19.5 inches long with blonde hair and blue eyes. I am excited to share some photos and stories about our new family in the coming weeks. I was hesitant to share our birth story because it isn't a very positive one but I so enjoyed reading other people's birth stories when I was pregnant that I'm putting it out there for those who are interested. In short, I had a very long and difficult labor that ended in a c-section, not exactly what I was planning.  We are both doing well now -- on the road to recovery.

Here is the longer version for those who are interested in birth stories:
On Thursday the 18th we went to our appointment with the midwives and I was already dilated 2.5cm so we were starting to get excited that he may arrive soon. Early Friday morning (around 2am) I woke up having strong-ish contractions, I got up and took a bath and was trying to decide if this was the real thing or if it was just more Braxton Hicks contractions like I had been experiencing for the past nine weeks. I spent the rest of the night dozing and breathing through the contractions. In the morning I started timing the contractions and they were getting stronger and closer together. Patrick and I walked to the cafe down the street to get some iced tea and they increased even more. We called our fabulous doula, Vanessa, and the midwives and headed to the hospital arriving around 3:00pm. By the time we got there I was dilated to 3.5cm and the contractions were very painful. Vanessa arrived and we started using all of the techniques that we'd planned on for a natural labor. For the next nine hours I walked, rocked, stood in the shower and soaked in the jacuzzi bath, breathing through each contraction. It was very painful (especially in my hips, yow!) but we had a good rhythm going and I was convinced that I was making progress and getting close to the end.

They checked me at 12:30 and I was only 4.5cm dilated, not even close to the end. At this point, with the help of the midwife and my doula, I made the decision to get an epidural so that I could endure the rest of the labor. This allowed us all to get some rest and prepare to start pushing but I wasn't allowed to eat any food. By noon on Saturday I was fully dilated and the midwife gave me the go ahead to start pushing. Although I was exhausted and starving I was excited to meet our little guy. After just an hour of pushing we could see the very top of his head and everyone was convinced I just needed a few more pushes to get him out...this lasted for a total of five hours! I was having severe mid-back pain all through pushing, likely due to his placement in my pelvis. The OB tried to use a vacuum to get him out but it didn't budge him and scraped his little head. Finally, after 27 hours in labor at the hospital, I was sent downstairs for a cesarian section. Unfortunately, the epidural was not working to fully numb me so I had to be put completely under with general anesthesia. When I woke up our wonderful nurse was standing next to me with our camera and a picture of baby Myles. I had to go for an MRI due to my back pain and then was finally able to meet my baby at around 9:00. The pictures that Jenny posted last week are just 30 minutes after I met him for the first time-- how Jason was able to capture photos that I looked even remotely good is a mystery to me, he is a magician!

Myles laying on the lights for his jaundice

Needless to say, our labor experience was not what I had hoped for and is still something that I'm working through. We spent five nights at the hospital recovering as I was in bad shape and Myles had jaundice that needed to be treated with lights. I am so thankful that we are both on the road to full recoveries and for all of the wonderful care that we received at the hospital. The nurses in particular were so incredibly kind and helpful to us as we learned how to take care of little Mylo.  I will post more later this week about how things have been at home but we have been incredibly lucky with breastfeeding (he has already surpassed his birth weight!) and thankful for all of the support from family and friends.

Preparing for "The Big Day"

No, this post is not about weddings...it's about labor! Eeek! As we get closer to the due date for our baby boy (July is just around the corner!) I can't help but feel a bit overwhelmed by how much there is to decide and think about. Before I got pregnant I always assumed I'd give birth in the hospital with an OB and gladly accept whatever drugs they would give me to ease the pain. But after reading a few different books and researching different options...and I am scared to even say this...I think I'm going to try to go natural!

When we found out we were expecting I did some reading online and after looking through various options in Seattle, we decided to go with a midwife vs. an OB (but still deliver in the hospital).  A lot of people have asked me why I'm not seeing a doctor and because we've had such a great experience with the midwives I usually can't wait to gush about . Being that I'm only 29 and have had no complications so far, our pregnancy is considered low-risk, meaning that I don't need a surgeon or specialist to monitor my pregnancy. This has freed me up to see a group of Certified Nurse Midwives whose practice focuses on normal pregnancies. They are able to give us more focused attention and are really in tune with what my desires are for our pregnancy and labor. Plus, we've had the bonus of being a part of "Centering Pregnancy," which means that our monthly appointments are with a group of 10 Seattle couples that are all due in July! Each month the individual couples see the midwife behind a private screen to hear the baby's heartbeat and ask any personal questions and then we meet as a group for 90 minutes to talk about everything from back pain to parenting styles to cooping techniques for labor. We have absolutely loved it so far, I'll be sure to report back after the big day.

Have you heard of Ricki Lake's documentary The Business of Being Born? I watched it last weekend on Netflix and although wouldn't call it "objective" it was definitely well worth checking out if your considering natural labor, birthing with a midwife or in your own home. Ricky talks through the difference between her first birth at the hospital and her second at home and explores the role of midwives in modern America. 

Would you ever give birth at home? Any advice from mom's out there for what you liked and disliked about your own experience? 

(love this vintage photo, where can I find a dress like that?!)