Yesterday was Jason's 30th birthday. Mine was right before Christmas but somehow now that Jason is 30 as well, it feels even more real. For the last year, I've really been struggling with the idea of being 30. Part of me understands that it's just a number, but there is still something with 30 that I can't seem to get past.
Now that it's happened, I've realized the only issue with being 30 is the one I've created. It seems I've set my own stereotype for what being 30 means.
Somehow I've convinced myself that 30 year olds are supposed to have things together and not constantly have dirty laundry on their bedroom floor and eat cookies for breakfast. They are supposed to grocery shop regularly and remember to renew their license tabs. These things were forgivable for 20-somethings. Don't get me wrong, 30 year olds are still allowed to have fun of course, and stay out late and make rash decisions and spurge on silly things, but they are expected to be responsible too. I've turned being 30 into some sort of new and probably impossible standard to measure myself against. Yes, I probably should eat more balanced breakfasts and fold my clothes, but I shouldn't let my mind wander to this place of guilt, that I'm not doing a good enough job at being a grown up when I don't.
Anyone else battling being 30 out there?
According to this quiz, I'm 19 and since the quiz was from BuzzFeed, I'm sure is extremely accurate and scientifically proven ;). Although, I'm pretty sure part of me will be 19 forever.
Photos above from Jason's birthday last night at Rock Box taken with the Fujifilm Instax Mini 90 Neo Classic, his present from me!
Ha. I am apparently a "rollercoaster of emotion" -- my real age is 24. Turning 30 actually didn't phase me too much, but turning 31 this last October really got me feeling semi-angsty -- like my clock is ticking, why don't I have more of my s--t together kind of feeling. Even though I know I do, it still made me take a huge pause. When I think of how old I feel, I think I am perma-stuck at 28.
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